This blog was started by me when my breakup happened. The whole scenario, even though not in detail was part of my first blog post.
Time has been quite slow for me, but still it has been 6 months and counting and I still feel like I am living in a dream. But the good news is I am getting better and so will you because time is a beautiful witch. It gives, and it takes something at the same time.
As a tribute to my life story and the past one year, I have written a breakup song. This song is just a very short summary of what happened in the last one year. The title is “The Wanton Wind”. Since every writer or poet has a pen name, I have decided to adopt mine as Mark Nauru. Why this particular name. It is a secret. Maybe you can guess. Or maybe I will tell you one day. Here is how the poem goes.
Continue reading “My Breakup Song”
This is the first interview I am going to do on this blog. This interview was given to me by one of my close friends living in Kassel city, Germany. He has told me to keep his name anonymous but I am pretty sure that somewhere in future in Lost Frequency Editions, you will come to know who he is. Anyway doesn’t matter how he looks but we need to focus on what he went through. Since he is one of the closest to me, and he went through a breakup as well just two months after me, I decided to take his interview first. Here is the background story :
Continue reading “A Ruthless Companion – Interview 1”
Well, my life before few months was perfect. Lots of things happening, good things, physically mentally and professionally. And if you might have read my recent posts, you might have understood that I have reached the self-destructive mode. What is a self-destructive mode? In life this is the phase, when you are quite often bored. Your life has become monotonous. The same repetitive cycle of just working/studying, watching something on TV/Internet and sleeping. When I say self-destructive mode, I mean, you have no motivation, no ambition, no schedule nor plans. You have given up everything to time and just going along with the flow. Some might say that maybe it is better to just let things figure out themselves. But I disagree. If I had done things this way, I would have been still living in my home country in poverty (or maybe not) with a mediocre job and life.
Continue reading “50 day challenge (Introvert Edition)”
It’s been six months exactly since I broke up. I have already written about how it affected me mentally and all the pain and suffering I “had” to go through. I used the word “had” but honestly the suffering has not yet finished. And now at the end of the six months, the person I am, has become much worse than how I was. But should my ex be blamed for this? Or the enemy is and was always within?
Continue reading “The Enemy Within”
Well it has been a long time since I posted something in this blog. Not that anybody missed me, but I myself missed writing my feelings and updating my diary. The last few weeks has been quite a roller-coaster full of emotions and thoughts. I was on a trip to India, my homeland (maybe this is the first time I mentioned this on my blog). And after I am back I had lots of thought regarding what true relationships really mean. I will keep it short.
The moment I landed at Bangalore International Airport, I had mixed emotions. I was happy that finally I was at home. Because honestly even though Germany is my second home, I have nobody here. I have “friends” and one of my best friend is/was my roommate. But his selfish attitude, lies and love for money and the misery coming along with it and those “I will do things for you because you did it for me” thinking made me realise it is enough for me to let go of this and rather be alone or make some new friends.
Continue reading “Family and True Relationships”
I was thinking to start something new in my life. I was bored, felt my life had become a bit monotonous after the breakup. All I did was get up, go to work, come back, and watch something on Youtube and then sleep. Of course I had started also dealing with stocks and that added some craziness in my life. But besides that I felt my life was not spontaneous and striking as before. I decided that on Sunday (8.04.2018) I will do something crazy and spontaneous that I did not do before. Which was to get up, take a train to the station of Kronberg and start walking without any plan or roadmap!
Continue reading “The Quest for Solace Begins at Taunus – Lost Frequency Edition”
Going through a breakup can never be easy. Particularly if you were sincere, honest and loved your partner more than anything in this world. Sometimes, you are not even in a relationship with a person but you just like and care about them. But they don’t give a shit about you. They have other priorities and you are just an option. It sucks. I know this more than anybody. I know how that desire kills from within. The feeling to want to see your partner immediately, hug them, kiss them, and tell them that you want them back. To show your love and appreciation to them. But is it worth it? Are they worth it? This post is about ways to conquer your mind, when these kinds of yearnings and thoughts comes to you. I am with you. You are not alone.
Continue reading “Time to let it go”
In one of my previous posts, I talked about what I realized about life, love, relationships when the breakup happened. Most of the people going through a breakup think that, they wasted time and energy in a relationship which was never right. But little do they know that they have grown as a human and as a person when they are recovering from it. In this post I will talk about other things which I rather learned but about myself.
Continue reading “My breakup – For the greater Good (Part 2)”
Lots of things have happened. I still have panic attacks and today I saw her photo in Google hangout and she had changed it to a new photo which she might have taken before going out. I had headache and anxiety seeing it. Here I was, going through depression and therapy and not able to interact and go out and have fun. And here she is, the little, only child princess, already moving on (or maybe it is just a facade) and starting a new life. It hit me like an ice berg and I felt more upset and started repenting on why the heck I even saw it.
Continue reading “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly”
Well, I knew it would have happened one day. But did not expect it to be so early. After not talking for almost two weeks my ex sent me an email telling me that what she did was not right and how she behaved was something really degrading as a person. The email said that, it was not right for her to tell those things to me and she is feeling guilty. Well, I love her and the first thought in my head was that I won’t reply to her anything. She has only hurt me and hurt me enough and it is time that I start living my life and don’t have conversations with someone who took me for granted. But then I could not stop myself (the heart wants what it wants huh?) and told her that :
Continue reading “A Surprise Email”